Don't really feel like dancing ballet anymore...

All of the sudden, ballet is boring for me ... I don't know since when i feel that ballet is boring... I think I started to get bored after my latest ballet exam... Its like super bord for me now... I can yawn even when I am dancing!!! Is that cool!? I don't know why... Why? I asked myself many times already... Still no answer... Does that mean that I am going to quit ballet soon? I really feel to quit ballet now... But... Are you sure Low Jun Lee!? No!!! I cannot give up ballet after all this years!!! I still have just 3 more grades to go only!!! Which means it only take me three years!!! Do I really wanna quit!?NO!NO!NO! Okay, Fine... Now... But it is really starting to get bord... I always get sleepy when i dance ballet now... Its like the music which is meant for dancing is a lulaby to me now... Stopping ballet?Quiting ballet? Its really not like me!

Maybe I really have to think properly... Can I really make ballet my future? No... I really cannot make it my future anymore... Yeah, maybe you are right... Maybe ballet is just a hobby to me...

Nowadays, i really hope for a partner... A dancing partner! ;P This is because i feel like dancing Tango or Latin rather than dancing ballet... Ahhh... Imagining me, dancing with my dancing partner, folowing the tempo of the music... wouldn't that be nice?

Sometimes, things will change... People will change... Time can prove to us that things will change...

我爱他还是他？

我不知道我喜欢着的人是谁。我本来是喜欢他的，可是，当我得知他又喜欢的人我的笑得很僵硬，很勉强。。。我的心有一种说不出的感觉。。。当我知道他喜欢的人是我最要好的知己时，我信这一个事实，也不敢去信。。。现在好了，我喜欢他，他者喜欢着她。而她呢？我觉得他又喜欢他。唉，爱情真不简单啊！我是喜欢他的。暗地里喜欢他。。。而他呢？因该没发现吧！？因为她每天只注意她。。。我身边的她却什么都不知道。。。我真希望她能知道然后去珍惜他。。。我呢？我自己又喜欢着谁呢？本来是喜欢着他的。。。却到他又喜欢的女生后却在心痛。。。我都喜欢，我才知道原来我是那么地贪心啊！唉！请原谅我吧！我也不知道几时喜欢上你的。。。但我知道我只小就喜欢上你了。。。可是，都不知道你喜不喜欢我。。。我觉得他是知道我喜欢他的。。。只是，他应该是不喜欢我这一类的女生吧！我喜欢他们两个！我真的都喜欢。。。只是他有了心上人，他呢？好像对我的存在一点都不在乎。。。我喜欢他们两个，尤其是当他们逗弄我小的时候。。。他们可是要知道我是个很少笑的人来的咧！我校智慧对着他还是他笑而已，其他人呢？可是超少的咧！就连对自己的知己也很少咧！我喜欢他们，真的好喜欢他们。。。不知为何？他们逗弄我笑时，我觉得她们都弄我的方式很特别。。。原来他豆弄我的原因这是因为她。。。我失望了！！！很失望！！！彻底的失望！！！彻底地对他失望！！！我的爱情被她拿走了！！！不！正确来说是抢走了！！！他自己却不知道她被人喜欢了！！！算了吧！刘君利！以你那么暴力的‘男人婆’的态度来看绝对没人会看上你的。。。人家喜欢的可是一个又有旗帜，又有美貌，又有淑女形象的女孩子阿！！！

Is this what I want?

I feel lonely at home...
I don't like that kind of feeling...
I am quite sad...
I don't Know how am I going to tell this to my friends...
I don't even know if i shall tell them...
I really don't know if i am happy here...
He fell in love again...
I really don't know what is he thinking..
But i got bad feelings about all this things...
Sad...
He brought her home...
I guess he likes her...
and she also likes her...
I don't know if she really can be... ...
Even she can...
She is cannot be my real... ...
Sigh...
I am pretty sad here...
With my friends not knowing all this...( is also better they don't know)
With Him not knowing my feelings...
If she really is the one he love...
The only thing i can do is accept her...
Life is complicated...
Oh well...
She is good to me...
Good to everyone...
but i don't know why...
I just know that she is not the real one...

I got a feeling that i like him...
But not love...
I don't care anyway...
He is satisfied with me that's all I want...
I am always happy around him...
I just like him...
But not love...
I know him since when I am small...
I like him since small...
But i don't know if that is lovely...
hope is not...
Cuz i really don't want that to happen...

hope parents will noe...

exam is coming in oni 3 revise work by more weeks time!!!
tat is not very long time for me....
it is hard for me to myself....
lucky tat i have join a study group....
gud rite?
haha...
but i have ballet dancing b4 exam...
i mean performance...
tis will affect my studies...
but i really like it!
haixx...
it is hard 2 make disition between thing tat u like n things u muz do....
aniway...
i dun care about my studies although i muz do it....
i will continue study ofcuz...
but i canot stop my likezzz juz bcuz i have 2 do wat i have 2....
i guess i am not wrong....
bcuz....
i have 2 have sum space for doing wat i like rite?
not juz everything i have 2 do....
i hope parents will think like my way instead of....
giving child alot of hw....
ask them revise work everyday....
hope tat parents will give their child a space for wat they like....
u will not noe if they get a gud result on their likezzz instead of studies when they grow up....

Lonely.....

I just knew that actually i am lonely....
no matter who try 2 make me happy is hard...
i dunno how ppl can make me happy....
actually in those laughing, smiling, there are lonely...
all the happiness only lead me 2 sadness... lonely...
is not easy 2 understand me....
unless u are my best friend...
not only best friend...
friend that understand me...
care about me....
make me happy....
know my sadness....
haixx...
it is hard for ppl 2 know me...
ya...
it is hard...
no matter what i do i am still the one which is getting scold...
no matter where... what.... when...
the next step i am going 2 dois always wrong!
wrong!wrong!wrong!
all i do from school to house to ballet....
is always wrong!
at school i help the school so much already...
1 meeting never go only....
the next thing i heard is when u dun have go meting 3 times u will get surat amaran....
wtf!!!
i help u so much say rubbish!
nvm i can threat as noting happen b4...
at home....
i never do anything wrong...
reading my novel is tat wrong!?
scold till crazy....
nvm still can threat like noting happen...
at ballet...
my interest!
i thought tat i will never get scold....
now!?
scold!scold!scold!
haiz...
this is my life!
MY LIFE!
MY INTEREST IS GONE!!!
MY LIFE IS RUINED!!!
scolding ruined my life!!!
i am lonely...
i only now that....
nobody will know what am i thinking....
scince she is gone 4eva i have no life!!!
no life!!!

Exam results...:)?:(?

Yeah! i have finich my exam!!!
NO!!!Teachers are giving exam results...
My result???
err...
nt ok and nt bad...
juz nice...
but i still sad lo of cuz...
bm 43... haizz...
kh 53... haizz....
sej 82!!! yahoo!!! 4 the 1st time i get so high marks 4 sej!!!
geo not good not bad 75 still consider A la...
math hatez... still gt 1 more mark then i can get A edi leh...
bc 61 ok la... still can accept...
bi 93 woohoo!!! tat is high mark... but it is easy so noting 2 b happy about...
science? haizz... still gt 2 more marks then i can pass my teachers boder line...
:( kenna rotan bcuz of the 2 marks...
2 more marks only...:(
actually for me is fine already bcuz mostly are A and B...
but my dad canot accpet this result for sure...:(
aniway i did my best...
the C and D are really hard...
haizz...
my average drop bcuz of the C and D..
:'(

friendship? yes? no?

When i just get back my enimy into good friend again(qing), i realise...
I dun really like Wen that much because...
haix...
Is not that i don't like her is that the way she treat me and sze...
U shall se it,its HORIBLE!!!
She and Shan like best friend like that...
like they are girl friend and boy friend like that...
This is too horrible...
terrible!!!
how can she do such thing in front of us?
now she is only in my friends list...
NOT EVEN THE GOOD FRIEND LIST!!!
But,
things are going to change in a short while...
she is changing school already...
she say if she goes she will never come back to puchong already...
because she is moving to Johor...
So,
if it really hapen i think we better dun fight...
but the way she treat us is really BAD!HORRIBLE!!!TERIBLE!!!
She thinks that i speak secret 2 sze gt problem...
actually i was juz saying tat me and sze go sunway take photo...
but only we 2...
cuz sze treat me as best friend and we know each other scince when i was standard 6!!!
and we know each other better!!!
now...
i only think that friendship is like wasting my time...
but i really need friend that i really can trust...
sze is 1 of the friend i can trust...
BUT...
i only tell certain secerets 2 her...
Xin is the other 1...
i only tells her the secret that i wanna tell her...
different secrets are ment for different people...
Not the same!!!








FRIENDSHIP BOARD!!!^^

BEST FRIEND:Sze...
:Xin...
Good friend :Jen~
Friend:Jack@
:Juene@
:Yee@
:and more!!!




As u can see there is no wen..
wen is at the middle part of my friend list already...
is she is still like tat...
she is going 2 be at the enemies part of my enemies list...